"Sometimes, you read a book and it fills you with this weird evangelical zeal, and you become convinced that the shattered world will never be put back together unless and until all living humans read the book. And then there are books…which you can’t tell people about, books so special and rare and yours that advertising your affection feels like a betrayal."
As a male bisexual I have dated very fluidly in my twenties then was in a few long term opposite sex relationships. But then I chose to not date at all and sort out my codependency issues.
During the period of not dating I got so much weird harassment from gays and lesbians that I am now committed to doing what I can do get bisexuals accepted.
In grad school a lesbian came into my place of employment and demanded I “come out as gay” and then for two years I heard say “which is it” repeatedly, a gay student did similar taunting, a gay teacher asking my orientation replied “Oh your one of those”.
Another gay teacher wanted me to come out as gay. And the head of the depart (Lesbian) responded to my bi identity by saying “we really don’t need labels” but she has one, and the gay and straight students had one.
And then a year later a gay director told me it was impossible for me to be bisexual in his words “I was straight and fucking around” or “gay and in the closet”. I can go on and on and on.
Since then my dating has been a bit weird to as I realized via online dating that straight women want touch me, most gay men have hang ups, and that has left only a few dates (obviously Woody Allen was wrong).
I dated a Straight women for a year who was paranoid if I stood next to a man we broke up – she did make an effort to understand. Then a gay man very sweet and supportive but also thought I had “heteroprivilege” yes I do come across as very straight so he is right but the moment I say who I am that privileged disappears quickly (we are still friends).
Finally I dated and am still dating a woman who has been as fluid in her dating as I have been. Yeah!!! But what the hell is up? Why do I get worse treatment in the gay community than the straight community?
What’s up? And why do academic papers say male bisexuality is less fluid than female bisexuality. And why did I not exist up til a few days ago?"